I spend a lot of time talking about self care on this blog and with June now upon us, it felt like the right time to check back in and really ask the question: how are you?
Lately, I’ve been asking myself this question, and I’m surprised that the answer hasn’t changed much over the past few months. Back in February, I shared about my burnout and why I stopped cooking lunches. Even though I’ve been able to carve a bit more time out in my day and shift some priorities around, to be honest, I’m still feeling tired and burnt out. And, eeek, the worst part is that – this is absolutely not how I want to live.
This brings me to this post. For the month of June I’ve decided to create a new “Wellness Wednesday” series where each week I’ll cover a different area of wellness that I’m personally working on. (Note: If you want to receive the weekly updates, make sure you get on the list and sign up for my free newsletter here.) This week we’re talking about energy management.
I hear a lot of people talk about time management and “finding balance” in their lives. Although I think these are important topics, I realized that for me, in order to conquer my burnout, I have to focus on what I am calling energy management.
For example, if something takes up a large chunk of time in my day – but I love doing it and it leaves me feeling fulfilled and energized – then that’s something worth keeping in my life. However, even if something only takes an hour of actual time in my day, but I don’t enjoy it and it makes me feel frustrated, over time it’s going to suck my energy, zap my creativity, and leave me feeling exhausted. This ends up taking more time in my life and uses up valuable energy that I could be putting into other projects. This is exactly what I wanted to start conquering, because I believe this is one of the main sources of my burnout.
Step 1: Get clear on what my values and priorities are
Getting clear on my values and priorities in life is usually pretty easy for me to do, but doing this simple act of writing them down on paper somehow grounds me each and every time I do it. Here’s what I came up with:
1. Create beauty in this world
2. Create a strong, healthy body
3. Take care of those around me
4. Spend time doing things I love with people I love
I believe that when you have clarity around what is truly important to you, it’s a lot easier to see what’s not important to you and to start shifting your energy elsewhere.
Step 2: Take stock of where my energy/time is spent
My next step was to a make a list of all the things that take up my time and might be contributing to my energy drain at the moment. I got pretty detailed on my list, but the biggest things boiled down to this:
- My full-time job (45 – 60 hrs/week)
- Writing my blog and running this website (varies, 10 – 30 hrs/week)
- Freelance writing and recipe development work (varies, 2 – 10 hrs/week)
- Assisting with cooking classes in Seattle (varies, 5 – 15 hrs/month)
Step 3: Start cutting things out and saying ‘no’
For me, cutting things out and saying ‘no’ is always the hardest part of this process.
After hours of debating in my head, struggling to make a decision, talking this over with friends, second-guessing myself, and backtracking on my decision, only to again come to the same conclusion, I decided it was time to quit assisting with cooking classes.
It honestly breaks my heart to have come to this conclusion, but when it came down to it, I’ve been doing this same part-time gig for five and a half years. Although I still love parts of the program I work with, there are a lot of things that have changed. The bottom line is that this simply wasn’t working for my life anymore and it doesn’t leave me feeling how I want to feel.
I also got realistic about all of the little things that I want to start saying ‘no’ to on a daily basis and came up with a few specific action items for myself:
- I will no longer respond to emails of a sales-y nature.
- I will no longer check my email first thing when I wake up. (I realized this practice has never actually made me feel good and on top of things, but instead has only ever made me feel grumpy/stressed from the moment I open my eyes. No more!)
- I will not put on the television in the background to fool myself into thinking I’m not actually working. This ends up sucking my energy as well as being a distraction to work actually getting done.
This exercise also opened up other epiphanies in my life. For starters, I want to take more vacations and have dedicated breaks away from work. I also want to figure out how to have technology (e.g. a smart phone) in my life in a way that doesn’t feel stressful and draining.
Step 4: Value yourself and respect your energy
As strange as this last step may sound, I realized that in a lot of ways, I am the one who is not respecting myself and valuing my limited time and energy.
Years ago I used to work with a fabulous therapist who would often tell me that “what you tolerate, you invite.” This couldn’t be more true.
Throughout this whole exercise, I kept hearing those words in my head, and realizing that over the years I’ve let my passionate, driven/overachiever nature push myself in this direction which isn’t healthy for me anymore. Although I can’t change all of this overnight, I can start by implementing small steps (outlined above), continuing to analyze where I’m spending my time (and what’s sucking my energy), and choosing to live in an authentic place that truly celebrates my values and focuses my energy on the priorities that make me happy.
I’m excited to continue checking back in with you over the next couple of weeks, and I hope this series will be inspirational for you too.
Take care,
Psst: if you’re feeling burned out by cooking and meal prep at the moment, I’d recommend checking out Sun Basket for farm-fresh, organic ingredients delivered straight to your door.
Their delicious meals have made a huge difference in my life on busy weeks and now you can get $30 off your first Sun Basket order!
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